Frustration can be a very challenging emotion. For many people, frustration means having a want, need, or longing for something that cannot be had in this very moment. In this post I outline the practical reasons we experience frustration, and strategies for keeping it under control.
Read moreResponses, Effects, and Taking Responsibility
In this post I focus on one issue that comes up a lot in my counselling work: the distinction between effects and responses, and how differentiating between these notions is crucial when it comes to how we assign responsibility for our own and other people’s feelings and actions.
Read moreWhen "Depression" Doesn't Sum it Up
Over the past several years, I've noticed that the term "depression" has become more and more commonplace in mainstream culture. With so many people using "depression" to describe their experiences, I can't help but wonder if we’re all talking about the same thing. Has “depression” become a catchall term for a whole range of experiences?
Read moreUnpacking Guilt and Shame
Guilt and shame are like conjoined twins. In the context of therapy, they’re often mentioned in the same breath. People typically talk about them like a package – as though we can't have one without the other. But if we take out our conceptual scalpels and split them apart, we’re likely to see that guilt and shame are actually fundamentally different from one another. But just what are those differences?
Read moreKeeping Competition out of the Conversation
We live in a culture of competition. Many of the concerns people bring to therapy invoke images of opposition to their problems. These competitive descriptions are almost part of the air we breathe. In this post I consider the implications competitive descriptions of problems hold for our lives and identities.
Read moreYour Emotions Aren't a Problem
A lot of people seek therapy because they believe their emotions are a problem. We receive plenty of messages that invalidate our emotional responses to events in our lives. In this blog post I discuss the importance of our emotions and contest the popular notion that our feelings are irrational or pathological.
Read moreThe Value of Anger
Anger is an emotion with a bad reputation in some circles. The reason for this is understandable. A lot of people I talk to equate anger with the actions that they or other people engage in when they’re feeling angry. But how can anger be helpful? Is its bad reputation warranted?
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